Category Archives: fake ad

My corona

Bored of waiting for coronavirus to come to you? Well now you don’t have to. Corona have bowed to the inevitable and teamed up with the world renowned creators of Covid 19 to bring you this zesty and infectious small batch artisanal version of their classic brew. Great for 14 day mini breaks at home or abroad.

I’ve been trying to resist the obvious Corona label update but temptation finally got the better of me. C’mon ‘zesty notes which are enhanced by adding a wedge of lime.’ is just not going to cut it with today’s hyper paranoid world view where the beer Corona has somehow been inextricably linked to a global pandemic. So i’ve fixed that at least.

Cheers

id-iom

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Blue WKD

Bored of breakfast beer? Why not mix things up a bit with some delicious and zingy Blue WKD. Made from the tears of aging ravers distilled with the finest sugar, raw spirit and extract of Smurf. Great as a breakfast beverage with Soviet era jazz. Try it yourself… 

To my surprise there was no supermarket description on the Blue WKD label. They’ll do it for some pretentious craft beer though. How frightfully rude. Allow me to assist. 

Cheers

id-iom

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The future is bright…

There I was, minding my own business whilst reading through the news when I must have read something about Trump standing for re-election because the next thing I know I have this image flashing unbidden into my mind. Tiny hands included. Rather than try to understand or reason with these thoughts I’ve found it easier to just make it so in an attempt to exorcise such egregious ideas. I should probably get back to some real work…

Cheers

id-iom

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An ode to Crystal Palace

If you’ve not been to Crystal Palace Park and seen the dinosaurs then I highly recommend doing so. They’re concrete, life-size and in need of some restoration. By modern standards I guess they’re not that impressive but when you consider they were made 150 years ago – before they even really knew what most of these dinosaurs actually looked like – then I think that makes them all the more impressive. There’s even little information boards showing what we now reckon the animals really looked like and I love they fact they took some pretty dramatic artistic liberties. 

The park itself is named after the famed Crystal Palace that housed the Great Exhibition of 1851 in Hyde Park before being dismantled and reconstructed in South London where it sat from 1854 until it was destroyed by fire in 1936. The area is also famous for it’s TV transmitter which, at 219 metres, is the fourth tallest structure in London. The park also features in ‘The Italian Job’ in the scene filmed at the athletics track in Crystal Palace sports centre where Michael Caine says “You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!”. So there you have it. An ode to Crystal Palace.

Cheers

id-iom

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The House of Requirements

There is a house in New Orleans they call the Rising Sun. But that’s not important right now. What is important is the ‘House of Requirements’. It has the ability to produce whatever it is you’re looking for whenever you need it but the key is knowing where to look. Literally anything may be found. The list of potential objects is effectively infinite. All that is required is a rich desire to find said object. In the case of failure it just means you haven’t looked hard enough. A workable solution always presents itself. It’s weird but it’s true. I know because I live there. Sometimes.

All this from some weird desire to produce something to respect the actual building that provided a roof over my head for so many years. And there you have it. It’s odd being an artist sometimes…

Cheers

id-iom

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Dead Pony Club

There I was, minding my own business, whilst perusing the aisles of my local supermarket. I happened to glance at a bottle of Dead Pony Club by Brewdog and realised the supermarket description (‘Pale Ale 3.8% is brewed with a solid malt base’ – blah, blah, blah) did no favours to a drink with such a name. I decided to use my overactive imagination as a guide to remedy this with a description a bit more fitting…

If this was an 80’s film this would now be the montage section where I scan, find fonts, use my computer and finally print out the finished product. We’d then segue back to me walking up the street about to complete my mission with the supermarket insertion of my replacement label. Cue credits. 

Cheers

id-iom

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