In the Isle of Man there is something of a superstition whereby Manx people can’t say the name of one of those little furry things that were blamed for the Black Death, pestilence in general and a whole host of other nefarious things. The reasons for this have dissipated into the mists of time but the superstition remains and due to this quirk in Manx folklore there are a number of socially acceptable local alternatives which include joey, longtail, ringie, iron fella and roddan.
Recently young people have also begun saying ‘r-a-t’ owing to the influence of English immigrants but older people on the Isle of Man don’t tend to listen to those Jonny come-overs too much and certainly not on such serious subjects as these little buggers. There is a comparable taboo against uttering the word ‘rabbit’ on the Isle of Portland. Here ends the lesson.
Title: Mickey or a ringie?
Media: Acrylic and paint pen
Surely you’ve had a dead end job that actively sucks the life out of you each and every day you attend? I’m pretty sure we’ve all been there. I certainly have. One where you lived for the weekend. Hopefully that was a lesson learned early on (and most probably the hard way) but now we’re a little wiser have moved onto more enjoyable positions. Anyway today’s pieces are a paean to the life of the wage slave. We can see he’s got his identical work ‘game face’ in each picture. This is because his face is permanently in this configuration during office hours as it’s hard to generate any interest when you do pretty much the same thing repeatedly. Here’s a run down of his week:
Monday – a stress in all ways; from getting up to getting home and all in between. Blue Monday to be sure. Where’s the weekend?
Tuesday – a grey day. Not much happened. But it is Tuesday so no catastrophes is considered a win. Where’s the weekend?
Wednesday – A day out of the office attending a training course. More enjoyable because of the novelty of not being in the office but don’t get carried away. It’s only Wednesday. Where’s the weekend?
Thursday – Some rays of sunshine – both literal and metaphorical – are just beginning to show through. You know the weekend isn’t too far away and it’s Thirsty Thursday so things could be worse. Today feels a little shorter than the earlier days of the week. Still, where’s the weekend?
Friday – Much brighter all round. But still at work. The weekend is so close you can smell it. Where’s the weekend?
Title: Where’s the weekend? (Grey Tuesday)
Media: Stencils, spraypaint and dymo
There are those who are blessed with the gift of beauty and there are those who have unfortunately been hit with the ugly stick. I hear you think ‘how very shallow for beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ and that is usually the case. But not always.
Nearly everyone who has had the misfortune of setting eyes upon this soul have come away from the experience in tatters. Expect psychological and emotional scarring for openers and just hope that it doesn’t get any worse than that. In the interests of full exposure I should really mention that it’s not just his looks which drain most people but also his unbearable personality. It has been said that he was once used to wake someone from a coma although how true this is I’m not sure. I can only imagine it’s a case of out of the frying pan and in to the fire with this situation though as once the poor victim is awake he’s fully aware he’s stuck in a room with this dolt…
Title: Some people call me pretty
Media: Acrylic, paint pen and charcoal
Do you usually start new projects in a whirl of positivity only to be confounded mere moments later by the nagging ache of negativity?
Do you enjoy putting off til tomorrow what you should probably get done today?
Would you generally prefer to be back in bed?
If you answered yes to any or all of these questions then our new range of demotivational pieces are ideal to give you that extra little nudge you need to justify to yourself whatever decision you’re about to make. It’s that simple! Anyone can use them!
Can be purchased this evening as part of UPfest’s 10th anniversary book launch. There will be a blind auction with art from 50 festival artists.
This kid has had 13 ASBO’s slapped on him this month – and it’s only the 18th of November! He just doesn’t care and it seems he’s collecting ASBO’s like they are going out of fashion. So far he’s had them for the following (amongst others as yet unspecified):
littering and dumping rubbish outside his local dry cleaners (apparently related to his misuse of the fabric softener)
A constant misuse of fireworks (including using them late at night)
Shouting and noisy behaviour in places where this might be annoying or upsetting (e.g. outside someone’s house). This I have a personal experience of.
Using rude, abusive or insulting language to pretty much anyone especially the old or infirm.
Threatening behaviour or bullying – including on the internet, mobile phones or other electronic media (whatever you do don’t let him borrow your phone or laptop).
Uncontrolled and dangerous animals – he has 3 feral rabid rabbits that he takes with him everywhere
Joyriding or using vehicles in an anti social manner (for example blocking access, noisy radios, wheel spinning); abandoning a vehicle – he especially likes pulling donuts at traffic lights.
Excessively drinking alcohol, alcohol related trouble or buying and selling drugs in the street – yes to all above.
Begging – he has such a sweet face (not).
As you can see he’s already got a tattoo of this achievement definitely making him the ASBO king and probably not an ideal next door neighbour.
Title: The ASBO King
Media: Acrylic, pastel and paint pen
With scientists discovering a new planetary system, Trappist 1, with a few planets that within the so called ‘Goldilocks zone’ (neither too hot nor too cold to support human life) this lady was somewhat fixated upon this news and was pondering what it could all mean for the human race when suddenly a light appeared in the sky above her. The light pulsed and expanded and then disappeared. And just like that, she was gone too.
I know because I saw the whole thing. What exactly it all means I’m not too sure. I think it was probably the men in black. All I know is I’m not giving it too much thought. Just in case. I don’t want something strange happening to me too…
Title: Something strange
Media: Watercolour, pencil and acrylic
Now I’m not entirely sure if we’ve ever mentioned the dandy but enigmatic man that is Roche Bobois before but I’m certain we’ve never, thus far, mentioned his boorish and arrogant half brother Nathaniel. For all that Roche has on the positive side of life it would seem his half brother is something of a inverted mirror image. Whereas Roche is dashing, brave and charming the same can definitely not be said about Nathaniel. He’s already seen the inside of a gaol cell more times than an entire family of pickpockets. Oh, and did I mention that he’s mad? Quite as mad as the Mad Hatter himself. He’s arrested for public nudity and pleasuring himself with inanimate objects as much as he is for public intoxication and fighting.
Although you shouldn’t feel sorry for him. He’s had every opportunity to better himself but it seems he’s pretty much bad to the core and even seems to take some perverse pleasure in the whole sordid affair. It just goes to show there is a very fine line between good and bad. Anyway I’m not sure why but I got this portrait whilst he was being detained at Her Majesty’s pleasure. It was just before he started eating a moth…
Title: Nathaniel Bobois – the half brother of Roche
Materials: Paint pen, acrylic, ink, pastel, spray paint and charcoal