Tag Archives: boring

The first schedule – Part 1 and 2

Although the picture is colourful please don’t let that fool you, that is just artistic license. The man in front of me was the dullest person I have ever met. He was a lawyer, suited and booted consisting solely of shades of grey. From his suit, to his hair, to the grey sheen to his eyes, just completely grey. I was stuck in a lift with him and all he would talk about was the first schedule, a subject I had no clue about, and still don’t want to. Anyway, after he had explained part 1, he tried to move on to part 2 and this is where I had to draw the line, figuratively and physically. I told him that he couldn’t move if I was going to draw him and that included his mouth. By the time the fire brigade had arrived, I had completed this picture.

The lesson of this tale I hear you ask? Always carry a small kit of paints with you to disarm any dullard when stuck in a lift…




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Some call me pretty

Today’s eBay piece is ‘Some call me pretty’. You can check it on eBay on the link below:


There are those who are blessed with the gift of beauty and there are those who have unfortunately been hit with the ugly stick. I hear you think ‘how very shallow for beauty is in the eye of the beholder’ and that is usually the case. But not always.

Nearly everyone who has had the misfortune of setting eyes upon this soul have come away from the experience in tatters. Expect psychological and emotional scarring for openers and just hope that it doesn’t get any worse than that. In the interests of full exposure I should really mention that it’s not just his looks which drain most people but also his unbearable personality. It has been said that he was once used to wake someone from a coma although how true this is I’m not sure. I can only imagine it’s a case of out of the frying pan and in to the fire with this situation though as once the poor victim is awake he’s fully aware he’s stuck in a room with this dolt…



Title: Some people call me pretty
Media: Acrylic, paint pen and charcoal
Size: A4

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Filed under art, Demolition Sale!, funny, mixed media, Painting, products

The Office…

People i like... (pink/grey version)

People i like... (blue/red version)

People i like... (varnish detail)

I love our studio… Just yesterday for example I was tidying up our ‘paper storage’ area and came across a small selection of the one and only proper print we’ve ever put out. It’s a four colour print on top quality A2 paper (well, strictly 3 colour and one varnish layer) and was created by a real professional (it’s just too frustrating to try doing multiples with our current set up!)

Anyway, as Christmas is on the way we are offering these little beauties for just £50 (including postage to anywhere in the world!) so buy now – before they are all gone!

I don’t think the motivation behind this piece is entirely difficult to imagine… If you haven’t worked in an office then you can’t imagine how lucky you are. If, however, you have worked in an office then I’m sure you can appreciate the sentiment behind this piece.  You only really have to spend a day in just about any office to know what i’m on about. Office politics, bickering, backstabbing, blame. You name it. In fact, that feeling is probably one of the reasons I love doing art so much. No one (well almost no-one) to answer to or to tell you what to do. And any credit (or otherwise) goes directly to you. No boss trying to take the credit (or pass the blame). Ah, the life of an artist…



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Filed under art, funny, Painting, products, screenprint, stencil