Nothing says sophistication quite like a plastic glass of Merlot. To this end Minivino have got the market cornered. After reading the supermarket description of such a marvellous creation I decided it needed something a bit more fitting.
If this was an 80’s film this would now be the montage section where I purloin the label, scan it, find fonts, use my computer and finally print out the finished product. We’d then segue back to me walking up the street about to complete my mission with the supermarket insertion of my replacement label. Cue credits.
I thought I’d give myself a bit of a mission and cut a striped halftone image (if that is what such a thing is called). It did not go entirely to plan. You can see what I intended to cut and you can see what the final outcome was. The work all got a little bit fine and some of the bridges didn’t hold.
Not to worry. Everyday is a learning day. And I’ve just learned that I don’t like cutting striped halftone images. Onwards and upwards… Cheers
You’ve heard of Tupac? Well here we’ve got Tenpac. The origins of Tenpac Shakir remain a mystery, even to us, who (assumably) created him.
He was just there one morning after an evening which ended in an agreeable state of inebriation. We felt he was too bad to live but too young to die so we decided the only decent thing to do was leave him on the street to fend for himself. The hanging 10 pack sign is a nice touch that we somehow pulled off pretty well all things considering…
They say that the devil makes work for idle hands. Luckily we’ve got alcohol to keep those idle hands busy in between bouts of creating.
Being the ironic street artists that we are we’ve decided to put paean to alcohol on a derelict pub. Take that society! No more idle hands kept busy in there. The devil will have to find something else for them to do…
This guy is an urban vampire. If you know what to look for it’s easy to spot. Bats for hair is the first thing. As we all know, vampires are naturally bald but over time they’ve convinced squadrons of tiny undead bats to cling to their scalps in some semblance of a hairpiece. They tend to have a glamour (or spell) that makes the beasts look just like a well tousled head of hair but if you squint just right you can see the little blighters scrabbling over each other for purchase or occasionally flying off to snatch a nearby fly.
The fact that vampires tend to smoke hemlock cigarettes is another giveaway. With a smell more acrid than burning tyres one hit will kill you in an instant but that doesn’t stop them passing them over for a toke to anyone stupid enough to ask what it is.
Finally, vampires love bling. And not just any one old bling. They believe that ancient gold artifacts posess the power of civilisations now gone. And the mythical Golden Fleece is the most revered of the lot. Here he’s had it spun into an actual fleece so he’ll be able to pass as normal a bit more easily whilst out and about. So there you go. Now you now.
He’s been lasercut on wood at 39 x 27cm and then lovingly hand painted before some gold and silver leaf was added (they love bling remember) and a drizzle of crystal resin to finish.
With today’s hectic lifestyle it’s no wonder we sometimes feel like we need to crawl into a nice dark cave for a couple of months just to escape a constant barrage of Facebook updates. For times like that I’ve come up with an advertisement for a (currently) fictional drink. I’m now just waiting for Red Bull to knock on my door to buy the rights.
I would imagine the drink to be something along the lines of an alcoholic power drink (do they even exist?) to be consumed when life conspires against you. A little something that would definitely separate the men from the boys. The online and TV advertising would feature an accompanying soundtrack of a dubstep version of Billy Ocean’s 1985 hit ‘When the going gets tough’ followed by the tagline of ‘Feeling tired and emotional? Try a can of Man The Fuck Up!’ read by James Earl Jones. And that would be that. I just wonder what a can of Man Up would actually tastes like although I’m not sure it would really matter.
It’s laser cut on wood and then hand painted and even has a little crystal resin on the can to make it look like condensation as if the can is nicely chilled. Drop us a line if interested.
Now call me old fashioned but I like to be asked if I want ice or a piece of fruit in a drink I’m paying good money for. I always say yes to ice and no to fruit (just so you know). Who on earth thought that putting a slice of lime in a vodka and coke without asking was a good idea? C’mon, show yourself! I insist that this nonsense stop right now. At the moment my passive aggressive strategy for dealing with it is tutting, raising my eyebrows and then fishing the lime out with my fingers in a very undignified manner and tossing it onto the bar in full view of the drone who served me. Next time it happens I may have to escalate it to something a bit more physical. Murky limenas indeed…