Now this is a bit of a weird one for us. We usually like to stick some pithy words or a face on any pictures we do, don’t ask me why, we just do it would seem. This is why this piece remains something of a mystery.I was in the studio making what I thought would be a spiffy background for us to work on when the other half of id-iom comes in and says he likes it as is. That was enough to make me stop and ponder what he was talking about. This contemplation sadly went on for about 6 months longer than expected…
I was looking for some gold leaf when I came across this canvas again and, would you Adam & Eve it, I suddenly beheld what the other half of id-iom had seen all that time ago. So, before we potentially do anything else with it we thought it probably deserved to see the light of day.
Just the other day Marcus was told that he looked bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. They thought he’d had some sort of surgery to make him look like one of the anime characters he was so fond of watching all the time. In fact, they were surprised to even see him out and about as he was usually glued to a screen watching the latest adult cartoons from around the world.
Marcus would have loved surgery but sadly he didn’t have the cash for it. What he did have money for though was a mystery baggie from Dangerous Dave down the pub. He’d only popped in for a pint on Monday when they opened back up but had been up for two days now and was still somehow looking fresh. What’s the moral I hear you ask? Well, that’s for me to know and you to find out.
We have previous with Martin here. Just the other day we told you about how he boarded a train to nowhere after complaining to Southwestern Rail when he missed the last train to Bristol (entirely his own fault). Perhaps you have been wondering whatever happened to that poor soul. Well, let me clear that up for you…
Martin was stuck on that train for what felt like an eternity to him but was, in fact, more like 3 days. Just long enough for people to start getting worried about him but not long enough for it to be an unsolved mystery.
Martin’s memory of the whole thing was hazy at best and the little he could remember couldn’t be explained without him sounding like a madman. He didn’t want that, he had responsibilities, and so he kept schtum about the whole matter. He never again sent a moody message to Southwestern Rail though. Or anyone else for that matter. What’s the moral of this story? You’ll just have to work it out for yourself…
John couldn’t quite put his finger on when it started. But it had been going on for a while and he’d had just about as much as his sanity could put up with. Whenever he’d go up to the attic where his extensive model railway was set up he’d find that things had been moved around. Never broken but definitely not where he last left them. He’d spoken with his wife but she swore on her life she hadn’t been up there in years, as agreed. After deciding it was extreme measures or his sanity he set up a camera trap.
Sure enough when he next went up his things weren’t as they should have been. After checking the camera this mysterious and slightly feral looking child with a small bird on his shoulder was what he saw. The police were called but ‘the Kid’ was never seen again. At least that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
The little tyke is on a nice 60x60cm square canvas and has been made using the power of imagination, stencils and spray paint. It’s finished for now but be quick if you want to give it a home as I’m already asking myself whether I can stand the minimalism…
I know the title sounds like a 70’s prog rock band or some dodgy porno but it’s not. It came to me in a dream where the Ladyfinger Cloud Pump is actually the newest and most revolutionary invention created by renowned British designer James Dyson. We’d been the best of friends for years and he was excited about his invention but didn’t reveal to me exactly what the device actually does.
After the name leaked media speculation as to the nature of the device was rife. I was given the task of coming up with some misleading marketing material to further muddy the waters and upon waking decided to fulfil my dream commission anyway. According to my dream the device will be available later this year so watch this space…
I was accosted the other day whilst perusing the aisles of my local supermarket. There I was browsing through their extensive range of packaged meat when someone sidles up beside me and says ‘Keep your eyes straight ahead. Nod once if you want some Clarky Cat.’ I slowly shake my head and just catch a glimpse of the mysterious man next to me. By the time I fully look round all I can see is his back receding swiftly down the aisle. A little shaken I abandon my shop and dash home but unfortunately this was the best photofit I could pull out. I think I nailed his eyes at least. Stay vigilant.
I’m on a roll now with our take on scam baiting. It all started when I received an email from aburimar777@gmail.com kindly offering me 40% of $5.5 million if I could help him get it out of Burkina Faso. I liked his brazen approach but thought his email could do with a little work so decided to give it a little style makeover (see here). We’ve also used his email on a few bizarre posters with the hope that he’ll receive some fun emails to brighten up his day. Now we’ve reinvented him as a man who’ll help you sort absolutely any of life’s mysteries – from the trivial to the more challenging philosophical conundrums. I’m just hoping that a few bored commuters are going to be mystified enough to take up his kind offer and chuck him an email…
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