In the post-apocalyptic landscape of discarded digital art and unfinished 3D models Janine moved unnoticed in the shadows and had survived five update cycles now by feasting on the binary code of unsuspecting half finished designs. She wondered how she would ever get out of development hell. She had tried everything she could think of – from corrupting her own code to impersonating another file format – with no success. Then, early one morning, BAM! It happened. She had been minted. Finally. She could now progress her plans once they hooked her up to the blockchain…
We here at id-iom sometimes get ourselves into a little bit of an impasse. One of us likes drawing nudes and the other does not, saying things like ‘Back on the naked ladies tip I see…(winking face)’ whenever I share a new one with him.
This is exactly how the conversation about this piece started and it would have ended the same way as it always does, that was until I found this quote from William Blake ‘Art can never exist without naked beauty displayed’ which I quickly scrawled across the picture. I might have found a workaround for this picture but the trouble is I have about 20 unfinished pieces all of naked women, can I find 20 more quotes about naked beauty I’m not so sure I can…
HAVE YOU SEEN SANDRA’S CLOTHES? Sorry to shout but it is fairly imperative that she finds them fairly quickly. It all started innocently enough but now Sandra’s naked and covered in blue glitter and can’t find her dress. All I can say is that if someone offers to play Sapphire Snap with you then it’s best to know what you’re getting into when you agree…
I think ‘Friend Zone’ should have some accompanying theme music. I imagine it would be some kind of weird 70’s disco affair but perhaps that’s just me. The lady in this piece was going to be used in a commission but (doh!) I didn’t read the brief properly and soon realised that it wouldn’t work.
That doesn’t mean she had to go to waste though. All it would take is a little love and attention and she would be good to go for something a little different. So i decided to change the sentiment from the commission piece and mix it up a little. The commission was to do with the moments before coupling whereas this piece shows the ramifications of what can happen after the deed is done. Unlucky pal, you’ve just been relegated to the Friend Zone…
Title: The Friend Zone
Media: Acrylic, charcoal and Tipp-Ex.
Size: 50 x 31cm
With a touch of the devil in her eyes, this lady is an inhuman force to be reckoned with. She can give just a side glance at any unsuspecting passerby and they will be under her spell, never seemingly to properly return to the land of the living ever again.
All they seem to be able to do with themselves is sing on the chorus to The Trammps 1976 hit ‘Disco Inferno’ on constant repeat. Now not that I dislike the song but when you’re walking around in your local neighbourhood going about your daily life it can get quite tiresome when nearly every passerby is belting it out at the top of their voice and it doesn’t help when they all sound like a gang of drunk cats about to jump in to a swimming pool. I may need to do something about all this…
To calm her down I offered her a drink which she excepted but to everyone’s dismay, she ordered a flaming Sambuca. No one was quite sure what she was going to do with it and we weren’t disappointed. She downed it in one and there in front of us the light orange glow of flames started to lick around her body once again. No one was quite sure but as she said her thanks she again started to strut down the street with smoke starting to billow around her, this was when I decided to take a mental picture so that I could try and paint her sometime in the next week.
There I was just last Friday having a few celebratory drinks in the pub due to the fact that another week had come to a close. When this woman comes sashaying past naked, literally on fire and without a care in the world. Now as I’m sure you’d agree this sent most of the patrons reeling, downing their pints and running off down the street. The more chivalrous of the group decided that instead of drinking their pints they would throw their drinks at the lady, thinking they were helping her out in some way but all that seemed to do was make the lady angry.
Well. What can you say about this one? I’m glad to say that for once this wasn’t just a product of my overexcited mind but was actually a commission. The commissioner got it as a gift for her boyfriend. It doesn’t really have much subtlety but sometimes in the game of love that’s all that’s required. I hope it had the desired effect…
We all only have one life to live so you might as well live it to its fullest, take every day as your last and all that malarkey and this beauty is doing just that. Her parents always told her to put her clothes back on when she was a child but she just didn’t care she was going to do as she wished and even now as someone more advanced in age she’s still up to her old tricks. Admittedly this doesn’t always go down to well at parties but then again who cares, certainly not her that’s for sure.
The other day i completed a similar picture whilst it was raining on a Sunday. Over the last few days though it has beeen absolutely freezing with my fingers turning blue as i was sitting trying to paint or so i thought (probably just a little bit of embellishment on my behalf there).
Anyway i decided to paint the girl again this time though reflecting my mood with the weather ouside a hey presto! what do you get? A picture of a topless woman staring at the floor but this time she’s blue of course.
I was just having a quick look through our Flickr page and realised that although i have already covered our work at the White Horse pub in Brixton I hadn’t posted the original image for the round 2 piece that we adapted to work on the wall. Strangely the inspiration for this piece came from a toy horse that was bought at a market in Spain that had such magnificent packaging that he just had to be purchased. I can’t imagine the toy passed any safety inspections and was probably covered with lead based paint but i had no intention of sticking it in my mouth. He even had some text on the box which had been badly translated into English (i’m guessing from Chinese). The text reads:
‘Flips the tail, horse runs
Truly scamper action’
The toy and packaging were magnificent in their crappiness but it did supply us with hours (well, minutes) of entertainment whilst drunk one night and at least we managed to get some artwork out of it. All in all i’d say it was a pretty good toy. It’s just a shame we don’t have a picture of the toy or box for you to marvel at. I’ll remember to do that next time…
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