Bored of waiting for coronavirus to come to you? Well now you don’t have to. Corona have bowed to the inevitable and teamed up with the world renowned creators of Covid 19 to bring you this zesty and infectious small batch artisanal version of their classic brew. Great for 14 day mini breaks at home or abroad.
I’ve been trying to resist the obvious Corona label update but temptation finally got the better of me. C’mon ‘zesty notes which are enhanced by adding a wedge of lime.’ is just not going to cut it with today’s hyper paranoid world view where the beer Corona has somehow been inextricably linked to a global pandemic. So i’ve fixed that at least.
Bored of breakfast beer? Why not mix things up a bit with some delicious and zingy Blue WKD. Made from the tears of aging ravers distilled with the finest sugar, raw spirit and extract of Smurf. Great as a breakfast beverage with Soviet era jazz. Try it yourself…
To my surprise there was no supermarket description on the Blue WKD label. They’ll do it for some pretentious craft beer though. How frightfully rude. Allow me to assist.
There I was, minding my own business, whilst perusing the aisles of my local supermarket. I happened to glance at a bottle of Dead Pony Club by Brewdog and realised the supermarket description (‘Pale Ale 3.8% is brewed with a solid malt base’ – blah, blah, blah) did no favours to a drink with such a name. I decided to use my overactive imagination as a guide to remedy this with a description a bit more fitting…
If this was an 80’s film this would now be the montage section where I scan, find fonts, use my computer and finally print out the finished product. We’d then segue back to me walking up the street about to complete my mission with the supermarket insertion of my replacement label. Cue credits.
It’s typical isn’t it? I try and do something genuinely nice and the world conspires to deny my effort. There I was walking down the street when I happened upon what must be in the ranking for worst sign in the world. There is so much wrong with it that I don’t know where to start – damaged, dirty and illegible to begin with.
I felt a sign like that was doing any business more harm than good so decided to engage in a little guerilla marketing and upgrade their signage for them.
I’d designed their uncommissioned new signage and got as far as looking for a local printer when I realised they’d removed their on street display. Maybe they’re just psychic and don’t want anything to do with my garish redesign. Or perhaps they’d realised the sign’s nefarious potential as it was. Who knows? That’ll teach me anyway.
It’s funny how many advertising slogans can be applied to the murky world of drugs if you’re so inclined. For today’s instalment in a series we’re imaginatively calling ‘badvertising’ we’ve gone for a reimagining of Coke Zero and the classic ‘Taste the feeling’ tagline and colour scheme. We could have just have easily used ‘real Coke taste and zero calories’ but preferred the classic tagline as it’s a little more descriptive in this instance.
Anyway, today’s piece is on A2 paper and is made using the magic of imagination, spraypaint and stencils. Drop us a line if you’re interested…
G’day! If you’ve ever wondered how some bowlers can deliver a ball with seemingly gravity defying swing then look no further. We’ve been working with the world renowned Cozen Academy for over 2 years to establish a new paradigm in ball tampering. Our patented high tech ‘yellow sandpaper’ works in any weather and can be discreetly used to rough up one side of the ball in a little over 15 seconds. This then allows for all kinds of bowling trickery – provided you’ve got the skill to carry it off! The kit is then small enough to be easily stashed just about anywhere at a moment’s notice and nobody is any the wiser. Work hard. Play smart.
The official kit is also available in a team-size max value pack for when you want everyone in on the action. Only available for a limited period.
With today’s hectic lifestyle it’s no wonder we sometimes feel like we need to crawl into a nice dark cave for a couple of months just to escape a constant barrage of Facebook updates. For times like that I’ve come up with an advertisement for a (currently) fictional drink. I’m now just waiting for Red Bull to knock on my door to buy the rights.
I would imagine the drink to be something along the lines of an alcoholic power drink (do they even exist?) to be consumed when life conspires against you. A little something that would definitely separate the men from the boys. The online and TV advertising would feature an accompanying soundtrack of a dubstep version of Billy Ocean’s 1985 hit ‘When the going gets tough’ followed by the tagline of ‘Feeling tired and emotional? Try a can of Man The Fuck Up!’ read by James Earl Jones. And that would be that. I just wonder what a can of Man Up would actually tastes like although I’m not sure it would really matter.
It’s laser cut on wood and then hand painted and even has a little crystal resin on the can to make it look like condensation as if the can is nicely chilled. Drop us a line if interested.