Time to dream

With the end of lockdown now in sight, we can now start to start thinking about the future and that’s exactly what Margery here intended to do. Before she fell asleep all she could think of was holidays to far flung parts of the globe where she would be invited to urbane parties with exclusive guest lists where she was the guest of honour. She wasn’t yet sure why she was the guest of honour but that’s what she hoped to find out over the next night’s sleep.

Sadly that wasn’t the case. Instead of dreams of living the high life with the world’s elite, she had dreams that left her more exhausted than anything else. She found herself traipsing through clouds like the Care Bears but instead of frolicking in the sun she was chasing ducks but didn’t know why. It was all very confusing for her. On top of that, her teeth kept falling out and growing back every time the ducks would quack at her.

This seemed to go on for hours until at one point when she was within a couple of inches from grabbing a duck when her foot started to sink into the cloud she was walking on. Suddenly she fell through the cloud and was hurtling through the air towards the ever nearing earth. Just as she was about to hit the ground she woke up with a start, knocking the glass of water on her bedside table all over herself and her cat which proceeded to dash from the room clawing her leg viciously as it scarpered for safety. After looking at herself in the mirror and assessing the bags under her eyes and the damage done from the cat she wasn’t particularly looking forward to going back to sleep anytime soon…

Cheers

id-iom

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Tand-fé (Gaelic for Tooth Fee)

With the eBay train rolling ever forward today’s offering is ‘Tand-fé. Click the link in our bio to go to our eBay shop. Updated every Sunday at 6pm.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/392166550779

Do you know what happens when you try and hide your baby teeth from the tooth fairy? Nothing good that is for sure. Most people think of the tooth fairy as a benevolent entity helping kids with a little pocket money in exchange for their small and useless baby teeth but it turns out that just isn’t the case.

A friend’s little girl had just lost one of her teeth and her mum told her to put it under her pillow for the tooth fairy – but the child was having none of it. Her first question was to wonder why the fairy wanted her teeth which the mother couldn’t rightly answer. Her second question was how much could she expect to get for her tooth on the open market (she’s a precocious child) which her mother also couldn’t truthfully answer but lied and said ‘Hmmm, what do children normally get? About £3.70 i’d say.’ ‘Never’ the child replied ‘I have ten times that amount in my piggy bank and this tooth is a part of me, the money will not sway me!

So, that night, while the child is asleep the tooth fairy visits but can’t find the tooth under the pillow. After silently ransacking the room she finds it in the child’s piggy bank and vows silent vengeance on the mother for not teaching her child the correct way of doing things and wasting her valuable time. So she sneaks into the parent’s room and steals a tooth straight from their mouths while they slept. Here ends the lesson.

Believe it or not this picture features some real human teeth which was just part of the haul we got in our weird but wonderful christmas gift of a box full of teeth.

Cheers

id-iom

Title: Tand-fé (Gaelic for Tooth Fee)

Media: Pencil, acrylic, charcoal and actual teeth

Size: A4

Tand-fé (Gaelic for Tooth Fee)

Tand-fé (Gaelic for Tooth Fee)

Do you know what happens when you try and hide your baby teeth from the tooth fairy? Nothing good that is for sure. Most people think of the tooth fairy as a benevolent entity helping kids with a little pocket money in exchange for their small and useless baby teeth but it turns out that just isn’t the case.

A friend’s little girl had just lost one of her teeth and her mum told her to put it under her pillow for the tooth fairy – but the child was having none of it. Her first question was to wonder why the fairy wanted her teeth which the mother couldn’t rightly answer. Her second question was how much could she expect to get for her tooth on the open market (she’s a precocious child) which her mother also couldn’t truthfully answer but lied and said ‘Hmmm, what do children normally get? About £3.70 i’d say.’ ‘Never’ the child replied ‘I have ten times that amount in my piggy bank and this tooth is a part of me, the money will not sway me!

So, that night, while the child is asleep the tooth fairy visits but can’t find the tooth under the pillow. After silently ransacking the room she finds it in the child’s piggy bank and vows silent vengeance on the mother for not teaching her child the correct way of doing things and wasting her valuable time. So she sneaks into the parent’s room and steals a tooth straight from their mouths while they slept. Here ends the lesson.

Believe it or not this picture features some real human teeth which was just part of the haul we got in our weird but wonderful christmas gift of a box full of teeth.

Cheers

id-iom

Fish Fingers: The Truth

WARNING: LIFE SPOILER AHEAD.

My life has been a lie. How can I right this colossal wrong? Can I speak to trading standards about the fact I’ve been mis-sold fish fingers my entire life. FISH DON’T HAVE FINGERS! It’s a fact. I’ve checked and double-checked. I even took up fishing for a while just to prove my point. So today’s piece is as much a public service announcement as it is art piece to vent my feelings on this most foul of lucifer’s lies. Fish do generally have teeth though. And this fish is, in fact, the pacu fish which is a close relative of the piranha and has teeth that look pretty much human-like. I’m not joking. Look up ‘pacu fish teeth’ if you don’t believe me.

As with all the pieces I’ve been doing recently he’s a bit of mixed media magic featuring some spraypaint, crystal resin, dymo tape and whatever else I was using.

Cheers

id-iom

The tell tale signs

The tell tale signs

Just look at those black pits for eyes and that cavernous mouth showing her bared white teeth. What a pretty thing, no? Now you might wonder where she’s been to look like she is in a 100 mph wind tunnel and the answer is staying out all night at one of those east end warehouse raves. The tell tale signs are the massive black holes that most people call eyes and the incredible gurning jaw which somehow manages to defy the laws of physics with its lopsided irregular movement. Needless to say when i saw her i just knew she had to be painted, she seemed to be my Saturday morning east end muse and the better i was for it.

Cheers

id-iom

The tell tale signs

 

A Hero to Save

A hero to save

Even heroes need some assistance every once in a while and this guy is no different. I’ll admit he doesn’t look like much of a hero but then again who does unless you run around in skin-tight spandex and/or have a magical assortment of wonderful gadgets and gizmos. This fella is more of your everday hero and he saved a cat from a tree last Thursday and didn’t even tell anyone about it. That’s just how he rolls.

It just so happened I was walking past and saw the brave deed taking place in front of my very eyes. I asked if I could take his photo but he politely declined so I had to recreate him from memory and as you can probably guess it was his smile that stood out. No selfless act should go unpublished…

Cheers

id-iom

Cardboard, cardboard, everywhere!

There’s nothing like giving yourself more work to do. I printed up these bits of cardboard in order that we could do some street drops (once the weather had bucked up and the cardboard would survive more than 2 minutes in the rain) but then decided it would be best if they were all hand-finished thus increasing our workload exponentially (i love that work ‘exponentially’!)

Anyway I always wonder what happens with pieces when you put them on the street. Do people pick them up? Does the bin man get them? Are they otherwise destroyed? Who knows. What they do once released is up to them – although i always wish them the very best of luck. It’s a harsh world out there and the circle of life is always turning but surely some must make it somewhere nice…

Cheers

id-iom

Title: Killer Smile Man
Media: Screenprint, acrylic, newspaper, ink & paint pen
Size: Cardboard

Title: Tobacco Kiss
Media: Screenprint, acrylic, spraypaint and stencils, ink & paint pen
Size: Cardboard