Don't sit so close to the TV. It'll ruin your eyes!
When we were growing up there was an imaginary line in front of the TV (a virtual creation of my dad) which we weren’t allowed to sit in front of when watching the goggle box for fear that we would ruin our eyesight if we sat any closer. Now whilst this rule is no longer enforced and I no longer have the desire to sit approximately 3 inches from the screen sometimes I’ll do so just to prove a point. Anyway I thought that would be a reasonable segue into today’s offering…
We were asked if we could paint up a wall mounted box (that is used to mount the TV to the wall and hide all the cables) so as we are a pair of design cowboys we jumped at the chance to give another boring black TV a beautiful place to call home. Our only worry was that by painting directly behind a TV there was the possibility that it might distract the viewer from their viewing pleasure. With this is mind we decided on a more abstract piece than usual but I think that the final piece works well and the client thought so too, so all in all another happy pair of artists and another happy customer. What’s next i hear you ask? Stay tuned but definitely don’t get to close!
I wasn't cheating in the toilet...
Jeremy Kyle really does have a lot to answer for. If you are somehow unfamiliar with Jeremy and his fantastic show he’s basically a down-market (is that possible?) and very angry Jerry Springer. I’ve included a short video below to give you a little taster:
Anyway now that we are on the same page you can add this artwork to the burgeoning list of crimes he’s responsible for. The text comes directly from a tagline from one of his shows and was just too good not to be enshrined in a more permanent form. Obviously, I never actually watch Jeremy Kyle. It just happened to be on in the background…
Where's the Weekend - on Hollyoaks set
Where's the Weekend print
What’s this picture you ask? Well, it’s only a photo of one of our pieces hanging in the corridors of a new set on a revered national TV soap! You just know you have made it in the art world when your stuff starts appearing on TV. As far as I’m aware the set is a new sixth form college that has opened in Hollyoaks (although I could be wrong so eagle eyed readers may be able to update me). Today Hollyoaks, tomorrow the world!
The print featured is available from Pimp Artworks (along with a few others) and is based on one of our pictures called ‘Where’s the Weekend?‘ which I think echoes a sentiment a lot of us feel after being chained to a desk all day…
Hands up who remembers ‘Why Don’t You?‘ It was a British kids TV show that, I was surprised to learn, ran up until 1995 (as i thought it had finished in the 80’s!) Anyway it’s not like i remember it particularly fondly but one thing i do remember was the theme song which went ‘Why don’t you just switch off the television set and go do something less boring instead’ which even when i was a kid found slightly stupid considering the fact that it was a TV show and it was advocating turning off the TV. I used to follow this advice quite literally and take this as my cue to either get my breakfast or just get out of the house and see what trouble i could get into…
Like it says – there’s never anything good on anyway!
Since we came up with the DUCK! piece a short while back i haven’t been able to get Disney characters off my mind. This time it’s Pinocchio that receives the id-iom treatment…
I had thought ‘BLUE – A life in the movies’ to be a biopic of the life of Pinocchio charting his early rise to fame following the Blue Fairy bringing him to life, a tragic lost period in his late teens and his monumental return to (adult) movies following a minor bid of body modification at the hands of a highly skilled Italian woodcarver.
I’ve clearly got an overactive imagination as i had Pinocchio’s life all worked out… After being a child star for Disney and enjoying all the trappings that would have come with it I imagined that Pinocchio would have had a few years of coke fuelled paranoia living in Hollywood whilst failing to get role after role as he was too typecast and the fact that “there isn’t all that much demand for sentient puppets anymore” – apart from maybe some seriously demeaning kid’s TV work. After a failed comeback on Big Brother or some similar reality TV show he’d slowly slip off the world’s media radar and spiral into a few years of failed relationships, drug abuse, debt and anonymity. Then, after a debauched weekend with an old friend they finally come up with what, even at the time, seems like a ridiculous and outlandish idea – that Pinocchio should take advantage of his old friend’s contacts, get a nose job and then start making some serious money again. He’s just desperate enough to give it a try and so one week after his return from Italy (where he’s been for surgery) he makes his triumphant come back to movies – this time of the pornographic variety. His rapid ascent to the zenith of the adult entertainment industry takes everyone by surprise and before he knows it he’s churning out porno’s at a prodigious rate and his star is once again in ascendancy. Before long he is a bonafide celebrity again and even Ron Jeremy concedes that he’s certainly ‘Got wood!’
I could keep going on and I’m sure i could actually come up with a decent script for this film (the visuals and adwork are clearly already done). I’d love it to be some kind of animatronic and/or animated tour de force. Basically i’m pretty sure it won’t be long till i’m working in Hollywood…
Keen eyed readers will (i’m sure) have immediately noted the use of part of the Electric Blue logo for the title of film (for those few uneducated readers that don’t know Electric Blue was a soft core porn show that was made in the UK and was shown on the Playboy channel in the 80’s) and therefore also the use of the Playboy bunny logo on Pinocchio’s top. The ‘Got wood?’ tagline was perhaps my favourite touch though as surely all the creatives in Hollywood couldn’t have come up with anything better for this film! As with DUCK! and Oswald the Unlucky Rabbit I would love to see this film get made…
Finally, on the art front, I just love working on the found bits of wood. It obviously works well for this particular piece as he’s a wooden puppet that comes to life but they are just really nice to work on generally and have a great weathered look to them. Now i’ve just got to get them framed to give them that final touch.
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Title: Disney’s ‘Blue – My life in the movies’ starring Pinocchio
Media: Hand cut stencils and spraypaint on found wooden board
Size: 57 cm x 21 cm