Tag Archives: girl

Vampire midwinter

Summer solstice is here again. Which is a good time for us humans with those long summery days but think about the poor vampires. This proud vampire lady has been reduced to taking twice daily cold blood showers in her dark and dank underground mausoleum. She hasn’t left for weeks and probably won’t for some time to come. Her neighbours think she’s off in the Caribbean for summertime – as always. In reality she’s been subsisting on a diet of fresh meat delivered by Waitrose and illegally streaming Netflix over her neighbours wifi. Even one minute in those glorious summer rays would reduce her to a pile of ash. Spare a thought.

She’s lasercut on wood at 39 x 26cm and then handpainted. Once you’ve added some crystal resin to represent the cold blood showers and a few little bats to represent her cheeky take on vampire home decor and you’ve got another successful id-iom piece. Drop us a line if interested…

Cheers

id-iom

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My most awkward dance at work

My most awkward dance at work

My most awkward dance at work

If you’ve ever been to an office Xmas party and reflected the next day that perhaps your drunken and impromptu Justin Timberlake impression with Nicole from accounts was probably somewhat awkward and inappropriate then spare a thought for poor Chantelle here.

She had made a last minute decision to do some exotic dancing for the bikers on the Isle of Man during TT week to earn a bit of cash for her upcoming family holiday for her dad’s 50th. On her third night, in the midst of some pretty athletic pole gyrations, in walks her dad with a group of his friends who’d secretly arranged a boys trip to the TT for him for his upcoming birthday. After she’d spotted him to say she felt a little awkward would be something of an understatement but being a professional she could do nothing but continue until the song finally finished.

She’d managed to avoid making eye contact with her father and his group but as she departed the stage after picking up her meagre elements of clothing from where she’d cast them she could hear someone shouting for more. Fat chance of that she thought as she pondered the more pressing question of how to tell her dad what her job had really been for the past couple of years.

Cheers

id-iom

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Man at work

I was just looking for something else on my computer when I come across this rare image of the younger half of id-iom actually doing some work! I know because I took the shot. Any pics that you may have previously seen showing him doing something that looks like work will undoubtedly have been staged or digitally generated using Photoshop. What’s more incredible is that he’s also up a small pair of steps (which are just out of shot) so that makes the whole thing doubly rare. He doesn’t like using ladders at the best of times. Even small ones. If only I could remember what had driven him to such extremes. Perhaps I was suffering from whooping cough or the more dangerous man flu at the time. Who knows?

Cheers

id-iom

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The Danse Macabre

The Danse Macabre

The Danse Macabre

You’re at the ball, you look absolutely stunning, you’re dancing with the most charming partner ever and then suddenly he whispers in to your ear ‘We come from dust; we return to dust.’ and you suddenly realise this is your last dance. The sudden realisation brings images layered upon reality, your partners hands start to deform, his face suddenly showing the sallow bags of decay under his eyes. You’re freaking out, realising the end is so very close but all of a sudden a calmness enters your body and you decide to take death out on the floor for one last dance. The reason for this calmness was a film from the late 80’s that pops in to your head – Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure.  The line “You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you dance with the reaper.” calms your soul leaving you to enjoy the last dance of you life.

 

Cheers

id-iom

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Other Peoples Graffiti (Food for Thought update)

Whilst making our way through sunny Streatham we chanced upon the boards we painted for the Streatham Food Festival last year that were still in place. There’s a couple of minor tags and what seems to be a lot of white paint that has been thrown at it. On closer inspection it would seem that the main culprit in defacing our picture is, in fact, the pigeons that live on the guttering above and have deposited their thoughts on the piece from on high. It would indeed seem that everyone is a critic.

Cheers

id-iom

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Nothing to shake a stick at

Nothing to shake a stick at

Nothing to shake a stick at

‘Nothing to shake a stick at’ seems to be a phrase that confuses people in general and this woman in particular. A quick internet search reveals that the phrases origins are shrouded in mystery. Could it be from farmers counting cattle or maybe counting fallen foes in battle? Who knows? This picture has nothing to do with it anyway.

In our studio we have a stout old stick used to defend ourselves against the spiders that thrive there. One day I came in, fearful of the spiders as usual, and found that the other half of id-iom had done a thorough clean the day before so there was literally nothing to shake a stick at. I celebrated with this picture. They’re back now of course and twice as big. I think they’ve been feeding on the neighbourhood cats judging by the size of them…

Cheers

id-iom

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Good morning Mr Zip-Zip-Zip!

Good morning, Mister Zip-Zip-Zip,
You’re surely looking fine!
Ashes to ashes, and dust to dust,
If the Camels don’t get you,
The Fatimas must.

Here we have some pretty interesting lyrics taken from 1918 ragtime classic ‘Good Morning Mr Zip-Zip-Zip’ where ‘Camels’ and ‘Fatimas’ are apparently references to cigarette brands that were popular at the time. The tune was a favourite with US soldiers during the World War 1 era and was available as sheet music for piano, band, orchestra and male quartet as well as for talking machine or player piano.

Just why the muse demanded I juxtapose this with a rather racy looking young lady clutching a couple of water pistols you’ll have to work out for yourself. It’s laser engraved on wood then hand painted and stands proud at 39 x 26cm. Drop us a line if you’re interested…

Cheers

id-iom

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