Tag Archives: Acrylic paint

Don’t blame it on Brixton

Over the years Brixton has been unfairly blamed for all sorts of things from gangs and guns to riots and robbery but it’s far too easy to try and sum up a place in a sensationalist sentence when the true causes of such phenomena are far more complicated and historical – but that doesn’t make good newspaper headlines.

Having lived in Brixton for almost 20 years the place I know and love is vibrant and fun loving and certainly not the one that hits the headlines every once in a while.  Sure, bad stuff happens in Brixton occasionally but that’s true of just about everywhere in London. Good things happen regularly too but are rarely as newsworthy. You know what? You can blame whoever you but just don’t blame it on Brixton…

Cheers

id-iom

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My most awkward dance at work

My most awkward dance at work

My most awkward dance at work

If you’ve ever been to an office Xmas party and reflected the next day that perhaps your drunken and impromptu Justin Timberlake impression with Nicole from accounts was probably somewhat awkward and inappropriate then spare a thought for poor Chantelle here.

She had made a last minute decision to do some exotic dancing for the bikers on the Isle of Man during TT week to earn a bit of cash for her upcoming family holiday for her dad’s 50th. On her third night, in the midst of some pretty athletic pole gyrations, in walks her dad with a group of his friends who’d secretly arranged a boys trip to the TT for him for his upcoming birthday. After she’d spotted him to say she felt a little awkward would be something of an understatement but being a professional she could do nothing but continue until the song finally finished.

She’d managed to avoid making eye contact with her father and his group but as she departed the stage after picking up her meagre elements of clothing from where she’d cast them she could hear someone shouting for more. Fat chance of that she thought as she pondered the more pressing question of how to tell her dad what her job had really been for the past couple of years.

Cheers

id-iom

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ASBO King

ASBO King

ASBO King

This kid has had 13 ASBO’s slapped on him this month – and it’s only the fifth of June! He just doesn’t care and it seems he’s collecting ASBO’s like they are going out of fashion. So far he’s had them for the following (amongst others as yet unspecified):

  • littering and dumping rubbish outside his local dry cleaners (apparently related to his misuse of the fabric softener)
  • A constant misuse of fireworks (including using them late at night)
  • Shouting and noisy behaviour in places where this might be annoying or upsetting (e.g. outside someone’s house). This I have a personal experience of.
  • Using rude, abusive or insulting language to pretty much anyone especially the old or infirm.
  • Threatening behaviour or bullying – including on the internet, mobile phones or other electronic media (whatever you do don’t let him borrow your phone or laptop).
  • Uncontrolled and dangerous animals – he has 3 feral rabid rabbits that he takes with him everywhere
  • Joyriding or using vehicles in an anti social manner (for example blocking access, noisy radios, wheel spinning); abandoning a vehicle – he especially likes pulling donuts at traffic lights.
  • Excessively drinking alcohol, alcohol related trouble or buying and selling drugs in the street – yes to all above.
  • Begging – he has such a sweet face (not).

As you can see he’s already got a tattoo of this achievement definitely making him the ASBO king and probably not an ideal next door neighbour.

Cheers

id-iom

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Potfingered Pete

Potfingered Pete

Potfingered Pete

Pssst! Wanna hear a story?

Peter here used to work for the council maintaining the parks and green spaces. He was good at his job and stuck at it for 22 years until the council streamlined their financing and outsourced park maintenance to a private company. After a lengthy period of unemployment Peter now grows what is undoubtedly the finest cannabis in the Rhondda Valley. Hooray for Peter!

Our portrait of Potfingered Pete makes him look a little sinister but then for the last few years he’s lived by the motto ‘old age and treachery beats youth and exuberance’ and who’s to say he’s wrong. On A4 and made using the magic of watercolour, acrylic and pencil. Drop us a line if interested…

Cheers

id-iom

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The Danse Macabre

The Danse Macabre

The Danse Macabre

You’re at the ball, you look absolutely stunning, you’re dancing with the most charming partner ever and then suddenly he whispers in to your ear ‘We come from dust; we return to dust.’ and you suddenly realise this is your last dance. The sudden realisation brings images layered upon reality, your partners hands start to deform, his face suddenly showing the sallow bags of decay under his eyes. You’re freaking out, realising the end is so very close but all of a sudden a calmness enters your body and you decide to take death out on the floor for one last dance. The reason for this calmness was a film from the late 80’s that pops in to your head – Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure.  The line “You might be a king or a little street sweeper, but sooner or later you dance with the reaper.” calms your soul leaving you to enjoy the last dance of you life.

 

Cheers

id-iom

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God save the Queen

For this commission the only instruction I was given was ‘bees’. Now that is the kind of commission I like. And this is what you get. A dwindling global bee population can only be bad news for puny humans as the bees pollinate an awful lot of the crops and flowers that we depend on for food. Without them we are somewhat doomed so it’s probably best if we take a bit better care of our little insect cousins and make sure they can continue doing their job. And, as a big bonus, they also know how to make honey (which the crystal resin on the picture is meant to represent). Without that we’d be left with wasp gravy and you wouldn’t want that on your morning toast.

Cheers

id-iom

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Public Separation (Phil Collins – No Context Required)

If you’ve been paying attention you’ll know that our ‘Phil Collins – No Context Required’ pieces have burgeoned into something of an ongoing series and they aren’t finished just yet. The initial aim was to present Phil Collins quotes in new and unusual ways in order to try and exorcise him from my thoughts but now it seems I simply can’t help myself.

Today’s piece juxtaposes a post-workout Darth Vader with Phil’s quote about a public separation and hiding in hotel lobbies. I like the way Darth seems like he’s a bit fed up with it all and the quote could be about him. The internet was not very forthcoming about who Phil was actually speaking about in this quote and as he’s been married a few times it’s tricky to be sure.

 

Once you’ve liberally sprinkled a few pilfered logos in and adorned it with a spanky blue & white background then you’re good to go with another successful ‘No context required’ piece. It’s laser engraved on wood then hand painted and stands proud at 39 x 26cm. Drop us a line if you’re interested…

Cheers

id-iom

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